Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Gripe Board

So I feel like everytime I have come on here lately I have been griping about something that is going on. I logged on tonight to start griping again, and then I read a sweet post from someone I knew in Tulsa. It helped me to remember all the great things I still have going on right now. I get to stay at home and be with my kids, even though there are times that I just want escape....

I also get the opportunity to really study and read my scriptures in the middle of the day when I am not nodding off and falling asleep. Since I quit Facebook I find I have TONS more time on my hands. When Hailey goes down for her 2-3 hour nap after lunch I find myself really getting into the scriptures, the lessons for the next Sunday and also the Ensign. I also have time to actually do my calling. We have three activities this month so I will see if I survive to October.

I love the time that I have gotten to be closer to my Savior. I feel the Spirit more often during the day and I have also noticed I am not so quick to anger with my kids. I want to try and do things that make me feel that way all day long. This leads me to think that maybe all these bad things are happening to humble me. I haven't been the best at family scripture study and FHE hasn't been happening lately. Plus I have been feeling in a slump lately from not feeling the Spirit as strongly. I guess this was the way for the Lord to kick me into gear. Just throw some nice trials her way and then she will come back. If anything, I am grateful for the growth I have experienced in just the past couple of weeks. I am slowly feeling the difference and I am loving it. Now if only I can work on my service. I have also been horrible about family scripture study since Corey doesn't get home in time and it is all up to me. Yeah, you can imagine how many times that came through. So I have started reading to the kids at dinner time. Not real fun I know, but instead of mindless potty humor which is what we usually get I have turned to the scriptures. After a couple of verses I go over what we just read and ask them questions. I think they actually paid attention more. I just read the chapter during my study time and learned all I could about it. Makes for good dinner conversation as well.

So I have to post at least the reason I came on here in the first place. So I got our water bill yesterday....400 dollars. I kid you not. I almost fainted because our regular bill is around 160. I called the water people and they came out. The technican informs me that there was a leak in our water meter box, but somehow it didn't affect our meter. Ummm, have you seen our water bill little man? Of course it affected our meter, and our wallets to say the least. So our bill just happened to sky rocket at the same time that our meter box gets a leak. I wasn't buying it. I called Corey and I felt like I was losing my mind. I just felt like running from the house pulling my hair and screaming at the top of my lungs. Does anyone else want a ton of money from us while we are at it? Just wring us dry and then leave us in the middle of the desert. Corey could tell I was boiling over with dealing with everything else. So he is taking a half day on Friday to go down and talk with the water people. See if we can't catch some sort of break with this. I mean, even an idiot could see that the leak made our bill go that high. Do they think we are filling swimming pools in our spare time?

So that is the sum of it all right now. Me just making it day by day, hour by hour. I mean that is all I can do. Live for this one day where there is no bill in the mail, or no one surprising me with an over priced medical test. If I can just concentrate on all the wonderful beautiful things in my life and feel closer to my Savior for that one brief moment. Then I guess it is all worth it.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Great Article

So I just finished reading an article in the June Ensign from President Badnar which really struck home for me. It was centered around the Internet of course and how much time it takes away from our lives. He made a point that Satan wants us to be disconnected with our bodies and using the Internet all the time can make you lose sense of who you really are and effect your personal relationships that are real. As I was reading this I realized that I spend WAY too much time online. Now he made the point that not all things online are bad and that there are great uses for it. But the main question was are you spending a lot of quality time just surfing or on useless sites that do not add to and improve what you are working toward.

I was on Facebook all the time. If I had a spare minute I was logged on and seeing what everyone was saying. I was getting obsessed about games as well. I found myself more interested in other people's lives than my own. I have all this time I could be building my relationship not only with my Heavenly Father but with my own children and husband. I was guilty of this exact thing. So, I have deleted my Facebook account. Too harsh you say? Maybe, but where I am right now I feel like the less distraction the better. And maybe this one step will help me make more in the right direction to get myself where I need to be. My only question is why didn't I read this sooner? I have decided to make sure and read the Ensign when it comes and to really take to heart what our prophets and apostles have to say. So that is why I am no longer on facebook.

You Call That Results?

So we are short on the batteries now so no pictures to go with this. Corey raids anything with AA batteries when he runs out on his controller for his Xbox. So as of now my camera is battery-less. Which bums me out because I have had some great photo ops lately, and go figure it is when my camera is out of commission.

Well I went to see the Dr. about my test results. Just as I predicted. Inconclusive. I knew my case would not be cut and dry. My second round of blood test were much better but I still had a slightly elevated bilirubin level. So he wanted to do a MRI to make certain all was ok. I said no. We are swimming in bills as it is and there is not even anything for certain that they are looking at. Just one more expensive test for them to say, yep all looks normal. No thanks doc. So then he recommended I get another blood test in about a month to compare my levels. Now that we can handle. So I am just sitting tight waiting till the end of September to go and get re-poked in the arm. I am getting to be a pro at this. If my bilirubin levels are still elevated then he might be leaning toward Gilbert's Syndrome. I guess only time will tell.

Me in the meantime has gotten back to business as usual with my routine. I am still going to do my half on September 18th and training is going really well. I run with my friend Dadra who runs a lot and then a couple of men from our church who do marathons as well. It was really intimidating to run with men at first, but I quickly realized the benefits. My time and speed has increased so much within the past couple of months. Sometimes I feel like I won't make it that last mile, but I always do and my times have been amazing. I feel great right now. Haven't had a relapse and hoping that I don't. I am busy every day during the week between football, soccer and Karate. I am sure by Christmas I will be totally burned out. But for my kids I will do just about anything. If that means I live behind the wheel of my car for the next 10 years.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Money Stress

Is it just me or does anyone else have this disorder? It is called money anxiety and I experience it every time I have to balance the checkbook or realize that we have an unexpected bill delivered so graciously by our mail person. I hate money and I find that it can ruin my day. Before we lived in MD, we lived well within our means and it was easy to have some extra money to have fun on the side. Since moving here to good old expensive Maryland we find that even though Corey got a great raise, we are tight every single month. We used his bonus for vacation this past summer and the table that we so badly needed. But now I have that great fear of Christmas approaching.

I usually love Christmas, but as the kids get bigger so do their price of toys. This year the older three all want DS's and this would happen to be the year that I have medical bills. UGGGHHH. Even now just typing this I am getting anxiety. But the best part is when I talk to my husband about my concern, he just hugs me and says everything will be fine. He even will send me an email on my really bad days that just says "I love you and we will be fine." Some how just hearing this from him makes all the difference. We are going back to a strict budget in September, which we did when Corey first got his job in Tulsa and things were tight. Hopefully this will ease my mind a little and I can get some rest at night.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Gabe's Chucky Cheese's Party

Oh the joy of Chucky Cheese. I remember growing up and begging my dad to take us there. I think we went once my whole childhood, but for some reason the kids love it. We allowed Logan to have his party there this year, so we had to follow suit with Gabe. He was so excited. He didn't want that many kids there so he could use most of the coins for himself. Go figure right!! But everyone had a great time and Gabe was all smiles all night long. I have to admit the parents had a pretty good time as well.
Gabe in the ticket blaster, he some how caught one in his teeth and I took this perfect picture of him. This is my favorite because yes that is a real Gabe smile and it is so cute.
Gabe in the ticket blaster.
Group photo op with Chucky, notice Eddie's hand (the little boy on the left) he got a feel of chucky that no one else did. I bet Chucky gets felt up a lot.
Getting ready to blow out the candles.
Getting some one on one time with Chucky front and center.
The Ryder's having a grand old time.
Crazy boys.
Now to present my favorite part of the party. Once all the kids left to go play some more games, my friend Christy decided to show me her moves. I love this clip. So fearless and it sealed my night just perfectly.

First Day of School

I am so glad that school started up again. I think my kids were as happy as I was. Lexie was up and ready by the time I got home from the gym. Hair included. The boys not so much, but they did get ready.
Can't you tell how happy I am
Oh my Gabe, he was the least excited. He even cried for three days prior to even going. But I think he will be fine now. He doesn't deal with change well.
Logan is my big helper this year. He is making sure Lexie gets off and on the bus ok. It is so nice to have an older child to help out now.
Oh Lexie, she wears this outfit every time I clean it. I can't wait for summer to end so I don't have to see it anymore. She did her own hair too, which is why it is all slicked back.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Football Fever

Football season is approaching us and I can feel the excitement in the air. Corey is restless for that first game to begin. And I know this is the time of year I can go out with the girls on Saturday and he wants to just chill at home with game after game to watch. This year even my boys have football fever. More especially Logan who just loves it. He will watch game after game with Corey, play football on his Xbox and he finally got to sign up for tackle football this year. He just looks so dang cute in all those pads. I can't wait for his first game of the season. GO CHIEFS!!



I told him to give me a mean look, but I got the tired just out of bed look.
I came home from the gym at 7am this morning to find Logan and Gabe watching football. I couldn't believe they were holding still. Anything for football.

Gabe's Photo Shoot

These are the pictures that Gabe took. This the biggest I could get them unless I wanted to buy the CD. You can still see how cute he was. What a ham. Most of the poses were his own ideas. He kept those two ladies on their toes. I got a few different ones because I just couldn't decide.










Birthday Weekend

What a crazy weekend for birthday's it has been. I never really thought about how crazy it would be to have two birthdays on the same day. But at the same time it can be really fun for us and it gives us something to always have in common. My friend Cynthia's birthday is one day before mine, so I thought we would have a little lunch to celebrate hers first.
It was small if you can't tell by the three of us. But we ate Panera and had brownie's for her birthday cake. It was nice to just sit and talk for a couple of hours.
Here she is getting ready to blow out her candles.
Then came our magical day to share. I had to get a picture with my little man. There is never a dull moment with him. Just the other day he informed me that he wanted to wear boxers now because he was a man. I have laughed about that for days now.
Can't you tell Hailey is a little jealous
Gabe got this cool toy that you can build into different things from Grandma Esquibel.
Alisha got me these cool dish towels and dish cloths that I was in desperate need of. Plus I love the spoon holder to go on my stove top. I didn't get a picture of my mom's but of course it was cash which I have spent already.
I already got my Garmin GPS watch for my birthday but Corey still got me some chocolate and another Ipod gift card which I use all the time.
That morning I took Gabe to the store and let him pick out whatever cake and frosting he wanted. Plus of course some ice cream to go with it. He picked triple chocolate cake with Chocolate fudge icing and then chocolate ice cream. That boy will eat just all chocolate. Something else we have in common. Here he is enjoying the bowl after we made it together.

My wonderful friends Christy and Cynthia came over and cooked me lunch for my birthday. Cynthia made bacon wrapped hot dogs and Christy made some snicker salad which I have never had before. It was all so delicious. I ate so much food and felt sick all weekend.
I got some more Mexican candy

Cynthia got me these two shirts which I love. I am really into the little T-shirts right now. She thinks I am tough and then she calls me Supermom all the time. She picked out perfect.
Logan got stuff from Deseret Book from Grandma Rollins. Notice the book is upside down.
Gabe's finished cake getting ready to blow out the candles.
On Saturday Gabe and I went to get his pictures taken and also to get his present from Mom and Dad. He wanted his own controller (wireless) for his Xbox. So that is what he got. This is us getting ready to go to Sears.
Nice evil look huh? He did NOT want to get dressed up.
After pictures him and I went for some Cold Stone. I love it, but we can't afford to take all of us there. 11 bucks for two ice creams is dumb in my opinion, but we did splurge on just us two.
Can you guess what Gabe got? Chocolate Cake Batter with Oreo's, chocolate chips and chocolate shavings.
I got my usual Cake Batter with brownie, fudge and Carmel. It was so good.
What a "GOOD" weekend it was.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Early Birthday Dinner


On Saturday Corey took me out for my birthday. We had babysitters lined up anyways so we took advantage of it. It is so hard to get away with four little ones. No one really wants to watch that many kids. But thank goodness we have the Ryders who are so good to us. I was going to take pictures through out our date, but I forgot the camera multiple times. But we went to Outback and I had some fried mushrooms and a quesadilla that was so good. I also had a dessert that I shared with Corey. After dinner we went to the movies. Corey and I can't even remember the last movie we went to. But we saw Dinner for Schmucks and it was so funny. We had a whole four hours to ourselves and it was wonderful. And it isn't even my birthday yet....yipppeee.
I also had my yearly exam at the OBGYN today and I was anxious to see if I had gained any weight from two weeks ago when I went to the GI dr. I stepped on and was shocked that after a weekend of pigging out I had actually lost half a pound. It gets frustrating because I know I need to gain weight but either mentally or physically it seems almost insurmountable to me. This has been one of the biggest struggles I have ever had. Losing weight is so much easier. Now we are just waiting for the GI to call me back to review all the tests he ordered. I am hoping and praying that he finds what is wrong. I just want to get back to some semblance of feeling normal.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Distraction

It seems funny that just when life seems perfect, you get thrown a curve ball. I think it is funny how just two months ago I was looking at my life thinking how it was going so well. Then all of a sudden things are Topsy turvey and you don't know where you are anymore. I have had some awakenings, some realizations and also unexpected things revealed to me just recently. Things that have been there for awhile but went unnoticed. Things that may not have been there, but came to the surface just the same. Went and gave a tons of blood this morning for all the tests. I didn't think she would ever get done filling all those little vials. So now I get to wait and wait until they decide to call me and tell me if they have found anything. So while I wait, I try to think about all the great things that are still going on right now.

Thank goodness for the Ryder's who just moved into our ward this past month. I don't think there has been a weekend where we don't do something together. They were a life saver when I needed to go to the ER and they watched all four of my kids so Corey could come up with me. We are so grateful that they moved here, if only selfishly. But we do enjoy hanging with them. This past weekend we made the trip to Harper's Ferry, which I just adore. So beautiful and the kids liked it. It was a little humid and hot, but thank goodness for ice cream to help cool us down.

Don't they look so worn? We had just gotten there, dramatics.
Christy and I after we got off the bus. I am on the step below her so I look really short.
This is the bridge you walk over the Shenandoah River.
Train pass through the mountains.
The old lock house on the tow path.
She is all sass, can't you tell from this picture?
Lexie and Riley.
Look at those curls and the red face. She was so hot.
The view from Jefferson Rock.
Kings and Queen of the mountain.
I also have my calling to be grateful for and the lessons that will help shape me for latter experiences. I am grateful for my beautiful family and a husband who really cares for me and wants me to be all that I can. I have a great family of brothers and sister and parents who love me as well. Thanks for all your concern guys. I am also trying to keep up with Logan's football schedule which is no joke here. Every evening for two hours. It is torture sometimes, but so worth it when logan looks at me and tells me how much he loves it and thanks me for signing him up.
As soon as I learn more I will inform everyone. Now I am just trying not to stress about how we are going to pay for the huge deductible plan that we signed up for in January. If we can just make that, then no more bills. I just keep telling myself I need to show more faith that the Lord will make things possible for us. I guess it was about time I got a humbling experience in my life. Things were going way too easy.